There are a few things that could be improved but over all I thought it was well written

Not bad for teenage poetry. Love doesn't really hurt, that's infatuation and lust. Love heals. Good poem though ;)

I agree totally with darien. I think this poem could be improved, but for a poem by a 15-16 year old, it is really awesome
keep it up my friend
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Great poem. I really enjoyed reading it. Just a fewl lines seemed out of place.

As she takes hold of the bong

This line really doesn't fit in with the rest of the poem, and it makes little sense. It just sounds like you're deperately trying to rhyme and you can't find a word.

Also,

A world corrupted with hat

hate should have an e on the end . . .

Then there was,

With demented thoughts and crazy dreams

I thought this was the best line of the poem, it really worked and brought emotion to your poetry. Nice.

Peace. [Sole]