Good emotion, and the repitition is effective. i want to read more...
maybe you could even out the lines, make it flow easier by adding/ taking away some words, but all in all, its pretty good. keep it up!

Well, I can correct you're. I think you spelt it wrong. But the poem was sad, to think that that happens to people, is very sad. It could have been a little bit longer, but apart from that it's fine.

//T.L.//

The poem was sad and had great emotion in it, the repetition is very effective but maybe vary it a little just for extra effect in the last line or somethinmg anyway i liked it xxALLYxx

(i think your name is ally)
so, ally -
I gave this poem a 3 for several reasons. First of all, you`ve got a couple of grammatical errors you may want to correct. This poem really had no theme, and you shouldn't post poems until they are completely done. This is because people will give you low ratings for unfinished work, but, once you fix it, they'll be stuck on there. So consider that, dear. Otherwise, not bad.

Samantha Hollywood

It was ok, but i think you could've put a lot more into it, i'll check out your others though