Brittni --
You did a nice job on this one. You used correct grammar, though some of your lines could have used commas. The flow was much better -- but again, I`m going to suggest self-evaluation. You need to personally KNOW and accept what other people are reading BEFORE you post it. Then you`ll know what needs fixing, and what works out. Nice job, 5/5.
I think I`ve done enough of your poems for now. =D I`ll do more later.

Love Much,
Samantha Hollywood