Too late

by *Sweet as your worst nightmare*   Jul 29, 2006


Too Late
I stand there watching my life pass me by
Thinking that i should stop it and turn it around
Maybe i should give it up
The cold of the blade comforts me so
My tears flow down my skin
So soft like dew in the morning
Some people seem to care
I learnd my lesson never to trust
Can any one stop me now

I lay on the bed and holde the blade closer
Just so i can watch the blood fall down my are
Closeing my eyes
I think just a few more seconds
It\'ll all be over
You run to my door
After seeing the kitchen covered on blood
You run to my side but see its to late.

Brittni Nicole Leiker

Copyright ©2006 Brittni Nicole Leiker

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  • 18 years ago

    by Samantha Hollywood

    Brittni --
    Again, I had to give this poem a 4/5. The flow was much better on this, not so forced, and it seemed to have a steady rhythm to it. But again with the grammar -- you`re writing questions, but not ending them with '?', and not capitalizing your 'I'`s. You`re also not adding apostrophes where they should be ;; you really need to watch that, or people won`t take your work seriously. I would try writing a rhyming poem ;; they`re easier and don`t seem so forced. Not a bad job, 4/5.

    Love Much,
    Samantha Hollywood

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