One, Two, Three, Four

by Candice   Jul 31, 2006


One pill yesterday
Two pills today
Numb the pain for an hour or two
One cut yesterday
Two cuts today
Release your pain through the knife
One tear yesterday
Two tears today
Drain my pain until it stops

Pain
You won't cease to let go of me
Your soft sad song plays over and over
You cause my insanity
You cause my misery

Three pills tomorrow
Four pills after that
Poison my system to let me die
Three cuts tomorrow
Four cuts after that
Slit my veins and quit my torture

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Latest Comments

  • 18 years ago

    by Samantha Hollywood

    Candice --
    Hey! Sorry for the delay in getting your comments ;; I had an emergency to tend to. But back to your poem..
    You did a nice job. I felt that the rhyming was complicated ;; I don`t know if you rhymed unintentionally, but I would definitely consider either breaking this up into smaller stanzas, or, watching what you write. When some parts rhyme and others don`t, it kind of confuses the reader. The flow, spelling, and grammar in this poem was perfect. You did a great job, 5/5, keep it up!

    Love Much,
    Samantha Hollywood

  • 18 years ago

    by BlackHeartRoses

    *gulp* O_O, What can I say other than sheer brilliance, and a bit worriedness for you now..
    ~Luv Sean

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