XxXxX hating myself more and more XxXxX

I don't want to be like this
i don't want to hurt this way
i don't want to wake up
every single day,
to the pain on my inside
that never goes away

it hurts me more
than a bullet through my heart
and yes i would know
just sitting here all alone
rejected by another guy

I'm not cutting my wrists
that's just stupid right?
so instead i slash them
make sure they bleed
some never stop like the pain in my life

I'm always doing things to screw my life up more
which makes me hate more and more
hate myself, and i hate me, for everything I've ever caused

i hate me
for every cigarette I've smoked
i hate me
for every cut I've made so far
i hate me
for all the insults i throw onto others
i hate me
for just being ugly, not a nice site, for others to see

and because i hate myself so much
i hurt myself, i slash myself
i cut myself so deep down, that my razor is covered in blood
blood that stains
which is why i hated myself in the first place!!!