People and hatred

If every person could look into my eyes and see what life I truly live. I would give anything to be some where else to choose the life I want. I really believe that would be just a dream. Some times the pain is so over the top that no one can help me or protect me from those people who want to bring me down. Although I feel rage some of those memories are not worth having. I feel as if I am breaking and shattering into pieces. Or I am getting stepped on and tumbled around in the air? Sleepless nights are not worth the fight. To let the light into some ones life, I try to make tat persons life happy, it seems that nothing would work. To serve that person, to work with that person . Hatred is all the vibe I feel when that person is around. Maybe I am not good enough? I don't even know is it me? Or just that person? I wish some one could answer my question. Brittny