Im Sorry

Slipping away,
In the darkest of nights,
Pain refills me,
I turn out the lights.

I reach for my pills,
Through the thick black air,
I take the lid off,
In the bottle I stare.

Determination fills inside of me,
As I gulp all 60 down,
I look at the empty container,
My smile turns to frown

A tear runs down my cheek,
But I know its what I had to do,
No longer could I take it,
Life doesnt just renew

I wish it did though,
Bliss to start over again,
Instead writing my suicide note,
In a charcoal black inked pen

I chose this colour because its symbolic,
Of my heart, my brain, my life
Im sick of trying to deal with things,
with the silver sharp edge of a knife

This was my only answer,
The only one I could see in my eyes,
And all I hear through my ears,
Is a putrid pack of lies.

So im sorry for hurting you,
But its something I had to do,
But please eternally remember,
That Im always going to love you.