Real friendship!!!!

FRIENDSHIP

Are you tired of those sissy-ass "friendship" poems
that always sound good, but never
actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series
of promises that actually speak of true friendship.

Amen..

When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot
revenge against the sorry S.O.B. who made you sad.

When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever
is choking you.

When you smile -- I will know you finally got laid.

When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it
every chance I get.

When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible
stories about how much worse it could be until you
quit whining.

When you are confused -- I will use little words.

When you are sick -- I want you to stay the hell away
from me until you are well again. I don't want
whatever you have.

When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy
ass.

This is my oath...I pledge it to the end. "Why?" you
may ask; "because you are my friend".
You may have read this before, but friendship is
always worth discussing.

Enjoy.

Remember:
A good friend will help you move...a REALLY good
friend will help you move a body -- let me know
if you ever need me to bring a shovel.

Friendship is like peeing your pants -- everyone can
see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.