Why?

Why do i do this to myself?
Thinking about that one,
That one special night,
That everything happened,
Why?

It means so much,
And whenever I think about it,
I just want it all back,
I want to cry,
And i want you there holding me,
In your strong safe arms,

But it will,
Never happen,
I see it as,
It's not meant to happen....

I got grounded because,
My parents needed to find out,
And they found out by a conversation we had,
And if they were not supposed to find out,
To stop this realationship,
Then they wouldn't have found out,

But they did,
And that.....
That is relatity,
Nothing else,
And that, is what I have to take it as,
Not as taking,
One of the loves of my life,
Out of my life, and away,
For me never to see again....