I Trust You With My Heart, Doubt You With My Mind

Haunted by nightmares
Tortured by thoughts
Fearing a reoccurrence
Scared of the possibilities
Trying to hide my tears
And forget my worries
They never seem to vanish
Im trying to ignore the hurt
And bottle up the pain
It's the only way i can handle each day
And move on to the next
The only way i can cope
Is to pretend im fine, like nothing ever happened
It helps to know you're there
Although i feel that you cant help me
Im glad to know you'd like to try
I know you try to talk to me
I see how hurt you are
Everytime i bluntly shut you out
Im sorry that i do it
But not sure how to stop
I wish i could tell you how i feel
Let you know when im hurting
So you could help me through
You make me feel safer
Then i've ever felt before
Pain is an intense feeling
When ever you're around
So determined to make me face my problems
I dont understand why you think this is so important
Why wont you let me keep pretending
Faking is my only defence
But you wont let me hold on to it
Im scared to show you
What i've been so careful to hide
I know you're trying to help me
But you're killing me inside
Your taking away my means of living
Im the only one i can count on
And your breaking me to pieces
Pulling my soul apart
If only you knew how scared i am
How timid i feel
You know how much you mean to me
You know how much i care
If i could tell you everything
That made me laugh and cry
I'd tell you right now
I never want you to see me cry
Never want to hurt you
Im in such a bad position
You could take so much advantage
Though i hope you never do
I trust you with all my heart
And doubt you with all my mind
I wish i didnt like you
But i do, and dont know how to stop.