by Jordan Smith Aug 16, 2006
category :
Love, romance /
lost love
Take my heart, tear it in two, no need to ask me for help, you know what to do. |
I really enjoyed this. You paint an interesting picture and again your words hold so much tense emotion. The only thing I would suggest is to tweak the 4th and final stanzas so that they follow the 2 line pattern you started as it looks a little disjointed and rocks the flow somewhat. |