Awesome poem. I loved it.

Darien, I can't say much about this. but i can say this. it made me cry, only b/c i can relate to it. the same thing that is happening with her happened to one of my friends and they still don't know what happened. but yes, this case has been going on for a long time. but i think you wrote this beautifully. it was very very sad..great job 5/5

Very sad, I'm sure their' family would love this poem. Keep it up

Sad and tormenting... A wonderfully put together piece. As always the flow is impeccable and the rhyming just perfect. Another enjoyable read. Good to still see you about my friend, keep writing... Viva La CC&P :D

Omg that was so sad and sweet. I think it's awesome that someone cares that a little girl died and dont think of it as just another bit of late night news. 5/5

Dude that was awesome 5/5 as a matter of fact all your poems are awesome!

Great poem

Wow. this is a very sad poem and it is beautifully written. you used great vocab. and the flow was perfect. 5/5

sophie:)

That's a gr8 poem. wow so true and so sad. i had a tear. very good job:)

With her body, buried secrets and lies
Hidden deep behind innocent eyes

^^Loved those two lines so much, OMG!!

This was great, Darien. But it was so sad. Your flow was really good, and the rhyming was great, didn't seem forced at all to me. Loved your choice of wording too. A very great job, tehe. Keep it up SMAWCE brother. =P 5/5

Natalie``

Awh, that was so sad.. The words you used were as usual amazing and just so descriptive.. Every line was oozing emotion and sadness.. It flowed well, but there were a few places I felt were a little awkward..

Silence shatter as the church bells ring
^ I think it should be "shatters"

At her funeral, family and friend dwell
^ I think it should be "friends"

Wonderful work as usual Darien! 5/5

"With her body, buried secrets and lies
Hidden deep behind innocent eyes
Her cause of death was never found
A mystery kept, six feet underground"

- Work such as this deserves far more credit then it already does. Most people don't realise true artists in the way others do- but I know an artist when I see one. It’s that instant power within your words I find that always keeps me on track and literally makes me want to read on. Your stanzas are so well structured that almost each and every meaning is silent and there is so much more left to understand. Beautiful work, Darien and keep writing, dear soldier =].

Yours truly,
-Elysium.

That was straight from your heart. I love how your words flowed and did not seem forced at all. Im going to read more of ur stuff!!!

5/5
Its very very good.
It's So sad.
;(
~Emah
best wishes

Darien,
Your compassionate heart is so beautiful . It is people like you that keeps this precious childs spirit rememorable .
Sadness pours from your words and your heartfelt emotion can be felt through-out the entire piece .
I hope and pray that on judgement day the (murderer-murderers) receives the punishment they so well deserve .
Touching write Darien !

Aaaw!!! that was so sweet!! my dad is a crime writer, and he recently wrote a story on her. so i find it touching!

The flow was really incredible. i think, considering you took the information and the basis from a newspaper article, you did a brilliant job.

the flow was really amazing and i was instantly captured by the sadness and emotion the onlookers would ahev been feeling. Congrats on writing one of the best poems i've read ina long time. nice work. 5/5
Punk out
-Snoo

Darien, I started following this case and I must say this poem was so sad and yet beautiful. I mean beautiful as in it expresses how much one person could mean so much to so many people. This girl could have been a model if she had lived, and the pictures of that cute little girl are heartbreaking.

Niiiice one. 4/5 i actually m strict with my votes, i dont put 5/5 if the poem did attract me a lot or made me cry, 4/5 is great though, but u have some verses that make u no sense... like dont add things just to add, if u dont have anything to say, dont dont add for adding. great poem RIP

Aww. I loved how you worded this poem. It really shows the passion you had for writing this. =) I recently have had someone pass away that was quite close to me. =( I was going to write a poem for the funeral, I just didn't know how to put my feelings into words. You have great talent to be able to do so. =) xoxo 5/5

Samantha