Waisted Time

by -The-Undying-   Aug 19, 2006


~Waisted Time~

Your the gurl in my dreams,
Though I could never see your face,
Nothing in life is what it seems.

Memories lost but not forgotten,
We could be so happy together,
True love can not be baughten.

Time slips away,
We mist every chance,
But we have one today.

Your in my heart,
Blackened beauty,
This is were it starts.

So take this oppurtunity,
And be with me,
Together with our black beauty!

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Latest Comments

  • 18 years ago

    by Nelle

    Awww that was very cute. i'm guessing you are in love? or was? or whichever. either way your poems are great. exspecially the love poems.

  • 18 years ago

    by Natalie

    Waisted Time

    [ Wasted.. not waisted. ]

    Your the gurl in my dreams,

    [ You're not your and girl not gurl. ]

    True love can not be baughten.

    [ Is baughten a word? Is it meant to mean like bought? or something? ]

    We mist every chance

    [ I think you meant "missed" there, instead of 'mist' ]

    This poem was kinda sad, but kinda cute at the same time. Nicely done though, and sorry about picking out all those little things, sometimes it just helps having those corrected. :] Great job though, keep it up!

    Natalie``

  • 18 years ago

    by xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex

    Your the gurl in my dreams, ((girl))
    Though I could never see your face,
    Nothing in life is what it seems
    ((This whole thing was a very cliche rhyme..))
    We mist every chance
    ((miss))

    This poem definately was not your best... You could have done so much better, I feel. You have more talent than this, sorry.

    xDarkSuicidex 4.5
    True love can not be baughten
    (('Baughten' Is not a word..It should be 'bought' which throws the whole rhyme off...))

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