I'm Saying Goodbye

In the core of me
There's a hurt burning
You're so sure of me
But the wheels in my head are turning

I'm changing day by day
You can't see it, you don't want to
But I'm changing anyway
And it's nothing to do with you

Depression settling over me
A dark cloud of anger and hate
But I carrying on smiling, you don't see
By the time you do, it'll be too late

I'm writing a suicide note for you
Not that you'll ever understand it
That I just can't make it through
That I'm slipping away bit by bit

I've been here before, thought I was cured
The doctors said I was getting better at last
I was applauded and assured
That I'd finally gotten away from my past

But now it's the future killing my soul
I have no where to go from here
So I lose grip and control
And I fall head first into my fear

I can't stop the voice in my head
Can't stop that god awful ache
I dream constantly about being dead
My life, my life to take

I will go today, with my knife
I'll let the pain ooze out of me
I happily say goodbye to life
And I'm dealy serious, just wait and see.

© Copyright Sharon Ardern 2006