Untitled (Unforgiving)

Aww wow this is a really sad poem you have written. but you did a great job on it also. i can relate to everything you said. wonderful job. 5/5

~Kristina

I say 4/5 on this one-it was good, but there were a few parts that could have been better. I felt like the end was awkward/abrupt and there were a few places where the punctuation might have conveyed a stronger, more precise feeling if it had been different. For example, I don't think the period after "Beat myself down" was necessary. Overall, it was a good poem, though.

As I lay
Still
Silent
Unforgiving

I like how yu ended it (:
This is good . I love the emotions expressed .
..ღ__MiNDYY

Very Good, I liked:
I'm lost and confused,
Dazed and bruised,

Bleed because I care,
Bleed because I love,

As I lay
Still
Silent
Unforgiving

These were my favorites.

For your title you should put it as
Bleed or Unforgiving or Storms
I Don't know giving you some ideas thats all

:)
Great Job
5/5

Hey, great poem! I liked the style you used, and the way you ended your poem with single words. Interesting. Full of emotion and nice flow. Keep it up! And thank you for your comment on my poem, meant a lot =)

--Angie xoxo