Irrational Angel. {Italian Sonnet}

by HOLLYWOODxBANGBANG   Aug 25, 2006


**This is my first ever attempt at a sonnet, it took me a long time, but please, if you read it, let me know what you think.**

-Irrational Angel.-

Irrational angel, humming so sweet!
Tickling ears with the words that make you weak;
Shaking as her cold hand graces your cheek
With soft riddles as the lovers lips meet.
Quivering with ecstasy, hearts beat
Hiding your smile, with feelings so meek
mixed emotions, bound in a bloody sheaf
Your life cloned to a pawn, and she knows the cheats.

A face so beauteous - - a dress so white - -
Breath coated in nicotine, she lightly breathes,
Sweat dripping off of your temple it seems
that reality hit you hard tonight.
With your last breath, you lost all dignity.
So goodnight my darling, may you rest in peace.

© Jenna Elphick
August 24, 2006

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by just*some*gurl

    So beautifully written for a first time writing one. My first sonnet entitled Reflections is posted on mysite check it out sometime. Once again Beautifully Written
    Just*some*gurl

  • 17 years ago

    by xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex

    Your life cloned to a pawn, and she knows the cheats.
    ((I would rather have heard 'Your life cloned to a pawn, and you know she cheats'.. I know that changes the whole meaning, but for me it would have flowed/fit better..sorry.))

    I really liked this.. This poem, like everything you write, is absolutely amazing. It's just..gorgeous. The story you told, the way you told it... It left me breathless! I wish I could write love poems such like you do. Amazing job...I'm sorry to say, but you were downrated on this poem; it's definately a 5.0 poem and nothing less. Great, great job.

    xDarkSuicidex 5.5

  • 17 years ago

    by Lovely Bones

    The last stanza's flow to me seemed a little choppy, but who am I to complain? i would never even think of attempting to write a sonnet! The descriptions you use in here are exquisitely beautiful. I hope to read more of your stuff! Keep it up.

    Take Care and God Bless,
    Sarah-Joy

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