This pain, it hurts so deep in my soul!
I cannot heal; cannot be made whole.
It brings such sorrow, sadness, and loss;
It won't give up until I have lost.
I live each day, hurting and screaming,
While my heart within me loudly is beating.
No one can feel what this pain does
When feeling from me escapes and goes.
Such pain will never leave me;
It keeps me in darkness. It bereaves me
Of all else but misery and pain itself.
Until I sit all alone; all by myself.
Ugh! I can't stand it; I take a knife
And open my wrists to end my life.
The blood flows down and stains my shirt,
And the pain in my heart no longer does hurt.
I grow faint and fall back in bed
Where I go to sleep. These dreams in my head
Remind me so much of the pain I once felt,
Until the time when my blood I spilt.
And it comes back as I come around.
Though hazy I can still hear the sound
Of sirens; I'm being taken away
To someplace to cure me, so they say.
I get out in what seems like forever;
The pain comes back. It leaves me never.
It wraps its hurtful arms around me,
Until the ringing turns into pounding.
I want to live but without this pain;
It keeps on torturing again and again.
My soul wants freedom; it yearns for relief.
But if this continues, my life will be brief.
It goes on and on this pain never ends.
It uses my heart; and my energy it spends.
I cannot keep going; this has to stop.
My sanity from normal to crazy has dropped.
I again take the knife, but instead of my wrists
My neck show red for my throat it slits.
I grow weak knowing that I may survive,
So I plunge the blade deeper, ending my life.
