Cycle of Self Harm

Red and swollen eyes,
Mascara dripping tears,
Today I renewed,
My long but not forgotten fear.

Waiting till the house is empty,
Locking all the doors,
Closing all the curtains,
Just in case someones near

Tie my hair back,
And roll up my sleeves,
Push my fingers down my throat,
Begging to my sin 'please'

Please dont let me do this,
Save me from myself,
I know I really want to,
But its such a big mistake

My sin didnt hear me,
For I said it far too late,
My contents became a waterfall,
Pouring out of me,
Colours of the rainbow,
The rain dripping to the sink,
Everything but a sun,
Ill never get that forbidden link.