I cannot truly express whats happening to me
All I can say is there is something eating me inside
There is someone damming me in this broken world to hell
Where I await for the rats and maggots to finish me of
I'll burn in hell for someone who dammed me
I'll burn for the wrong reasons and I wonder why
A deceiving lover, a deceiving family and deceiving friends
I was meant to be somebody
I was meant to bring light to lives but in the end my smile got broken
My world came crashing down
Who says you have to have everything to be happy?
When all you want is to be alive and real
Who says that what you see is the truth?
When only you know your truth
Everything was so sweet it all turned out bitter
The contrast of black and white wasn't going well
The changes of love and hate
The cage was opened of where I feel as if I'm trapped
And when I say I knowing my feelings
Others say ungrateful for not knowing the feeling of me
Have they ever felt numb, the feeling of death?
The feeling of hate everyday?
When tears pour you feel weak and useless?
The gift of happiness became demolished
And under the flesh is someone beautiful
Inside the mind is someone so beautiful but you would not guess
I wouldn't say I'm perfect and pure
I wouldn't say it's wasn't my fault
But I wouldn't say I stopped trying
I wouldn't say I didn't care I will say i kept reaching out
To find someone always pushing me back again
Deep inside I am breaking for not being loved
And on the outside I'm crying
Deep inside I'm wishing for more
And on the outside I'm shouting for acceptance
I need to be someone please but here I am alone in my room
Alone with these tears wondering why no one wants to accept me
Talk to me please and stop all the cursing
I hear all the laughter coming up the stairs, if only I was in the crowd
I'm the out cast in this world and maybe it'll soon stop
If I was given time to regain myself when everyday I'm breaking down till theres nothing left but my ash
In this gloomy world the sun sometimes shines, only if I could be left to be me
Whatever action I take its somehow the wrong way when all I'm doing is going with my heart
Mistakes are made to learn and fix them but I can never know my mistake if your pushing it away
The fake smiles keep looking at me and even though their eyes are closed they're staring at me
Why all this insecurity of being watched
When in every movement, in every breathe chills go down my spine
I'm haunted over and that evil laugh echoes in my mind
So stop and stop and stop
Watch me get up one day, when my confident will glow and blow all those away
When it is my turn to do something amazing
The deceiving is a forgotten memory soon to become
The light will soon show
One day I hope
