To Him

It isn't fair that I have to live this life, that's so cruel but I have to turn away from the knife. To my boyfriend the only one that I thought I could turn too, you left me just like the rest now how will I pull through. I could live without my friends even my family, you where the other half of me. My better part at least until you broke my heart. I'll turn my head and weep because my heart you will forever keep. It is torn and worthless but it is something I will always miss. You will forever have my love, and god will have my soul up above. You decided to keep most of your life a secret, now not leaving you the first time I truly regret. You've hurt me I just wanted you to know, and I didn't know any other way to show. You turned your back on me and everything I knew, and all the love I had for you. Now I have to forget about you and all the fun and our song. I have to start all over again, and this is where I start with this paper and pen. Poetry is my only friend, and will never leave it will never end. By the end of this year I will have a book, of all the love you took. I just want to jump off this Earth and die, because I don't want any other guy. You will read about this heart break, and will think this is really fake. But no this is real, because I can actually feel and I've learned how to deal. See you may have had your fun with me but I'll be in love again you see. With someone that will treat me right, from day to night. This poem is all for you and I hope when you read it you'll feel this pain too. You may have my heart and everything else that I cared about. But all I need to do is wait and then you'll hear me shout. From these pages you will hear how I held you so dear. In time I will have to move on but for now I'll long, trying to figure out what I did so wrong. To make you lie to make you hide, to make you interested in the other side.Sure it was just weed, but it was the hunger you needed to feed. The hunger to be like everyone else to get away from me, what I did to make you flee. I know you loved me at one time or another, but now you don't have to pretend, don't even bother. Your right you aren't good enough for me or for anyone I know so leave me in peace and just go. Go ahead pretend to be sad, because I'll soon be glad. Because finally I have control over one thing, even though it may sting. It's good to know that I can have hope for me, and that I don't have to listen to a pathetic plea. A plea for forgiveness because I couldn't care less. You can get away with anything, lying, hiding, and a little bit of cheating. But you can't get away with breaking my heart, and just watching it fall apart. You can move on in one day but the picture of me in your mind is there to stay. I want you to think of that pain you can cause, something that you can think of while my relationship with people is on pause. So to my boyfriend, we are over and this time it truly the end.
by Christina Ramsdell