by Jordan Smith Sep 26, 2006
category :
Sadness, depression /
grieving, loss
There it goes, far far away, never to fully return, it's starting to shrivel and fade, leaving nothing you can do to make it stay. |
by Linds
Wow... |
For me the beginning could use a little work as it doesn;t really grab your attention. However the third stanza really kicks in with a punch and provides momentum that is kept up till the end. I like the ending, it has a satisfactory conclusion feel to it. Overall another good write. |