As I lay my head down
A tear falls to the corner of my eye.
Nestled next to my nose,
I close my eyes and try not to see.
I try not to see the images of the flowers
I try not to see the images of the sheets
Disheveled and crumpled beneath me.
Why did you not stay?
You didn’t even wait for the sun to rise
As I lay my head down
I can still feel your hands in my hair.
I can feel the pressure as you pull on me
In your search for release
As I lay my head down
I remember the feel of your soft lips
I remember the feel of my lips
As I traced all the lines of your body
As I lay my head down
The tears fall
Over the bridge of my nose
And onto the spot
Where your head had just been
As I lay my head down
I can still feel the heat of your breath
As it glides across my skin
As I lay my head down
I curse myself for becoming
The one thing I swore never to be
As I lay my head down
I curse at you
For trying to turn me into her.
But now that you are gone
It is perfectly clear
I can never be her
For how could a mistress
Ever resemble a wife.
