I give you the same advice as the other one. The rhythm. Believe me, when I read your poetry I about go back in time, b/c the poems are so reminicsent of my old ones. All I did was stick to writing, which was easy, provided w/ a site like this, and you should too. You have such great potential. Just try to learn from the advice that's given to you.
PV
=) Keep it up.