Fix You

My heart has been broken
Worse than anytime before
The pain is overwhelming
Too much for me to ignore

It seems the more you love
The further you have to fall
I believed we had everything
Then we went and lost it all

I wanted for us to work
I believed that we could
So many mistakes we made
It hurts more than it should

I know that you suffered
Losing your kids was the worst
I could not make it better
Even when I tried to put you first

Then your father died
Another bruise on your heart
It seems your life meant pain
Right from the very start

How could I possibly save you
From 32 years of damaging distress
Especially when your memories
Meant anger and hate you did possess

When you raised your hand to me
I told myself that it was not your fault
If only I had done more I thought
I could have avoided the assault

You spat in my face more than once
To me that is worse then being hit
You needed more than I could give
I was finally forced to admit

If I thought that my love alone
Could bring you out of your past
Then I would still be willing
Because I wanted for us to last

I reminisce about that night
When we drunk vodka by the beach
Starring up at the starry sky
I felt that happiness was within reach

We talked about everything
As we sat on the grass facing each other
I swear right at that moment
I knew I would never love another

My pink care bear sleeps by my side
To remind me of how much you care
It does not matter to me that you broke it
Just that you loved me enough to repair

I know I have not always been true
Trying to cover myself with lies
I worried that you might leave me
If I let you see past my disguise

I knew that you were fragile
And I feared that you might break
In the end trying to protect you
Meant I made more than one mistake

It was not until I was in too deep
That I realized I was making it worse
I wanted to make it all better
But I knew I could not reverse

I started to live in fear of you
Knowing that you could hurt me
Terrified you might lash out
This is not how I want it to be

I don’t know what to do anymore
It seems like we cannot be together
We wind each other up so much
I cannot face this stormy weather

I want to protect my child
Avoiding stress is the only way
Especially while I am pregnant
I cannot go through this every day

I have never experienced such anger
As the times when I fought with you
It seems no matter how much I tried
There was nothing that I could do

You pull me up on everything
I never can do anything right
I feel really downtrodden now
I just do not have it in me to fight

I wish I could take your pain away
Kiss away all of your falling tears
Take you in my arms at night
And erase all of those painful years

I pray that I can make a difference
Be the one to fix your broken wings
Show you the true meaning of love
And all the happiness and joy it brings