Barriers (letter to a friend)

I was supposed to know my limits,
To know the demon inside,
But I did not know the consequence,
Of letting loose past the wall divide,

Now the demon is awake,
And begging for another shot,
And I am scared to death he will break free,
And make me into what I am not,

However, I know his strength,
And I can hold him back,
I just hope that what he did,
Does not leave a lasting impact,

I know it was my fault,
And it kills me everyday,
To know the fear, the sorrow,
And all of the pain I caused that way,

I don't value myself,
Half as much as you,
So in order to break the demon down,
I will do whatever I need to,

It will never happen again,
But I don't know if you can trust,
When the promise was broken last time,
When the barriers went down into lust,

I am a better person now,
That I have seen the devil within,
I deeply regret hurting you,
So I repent for my sin,

The hell I have punished myself with,
Is the worst I can bear,
But it would feel like nothing,
For you to leave me standing here,

So take this as the biggest apology,
That a simple guy like me can make,
My heart and soul bared to you,
I'll give it all for your sake,

If you can find it in your heart to forgive,
Grateful I would truly be,
But some things are irredeemable,
So I look at this understandably,

I love you and probably always will,
In some small way, shape, or form,
To emerge from this pure and happy,
Would be the second time I was born,

I don't know how to end this,
So let me give it a try,
I will never do anything to hurt you again,
No matter what happens by and by