Hun,i have been there and done that. maybe not exactly the same as you but yea. i mean i 'faked a smile' and ya kno that was the worst thing i could do. i was being changed by others i let them change me cuz i wanted to be in 'in' crowd so i let people shape me then i hit rock bottom and i didnt even kno who i was, i was being pushed around i was tired of being someone i wasnt, i wanted to bad to be me but didnt kno how to be me cuz i never was, so dont change who you are. but then one day this girl saw me and she started talking to me and she said to me"why i dont kno who you are." i said "you should kno who i am we have known eachother for 2 years" she said "i kno you but i dont kno who you are, why cant you just be you? i have watched you change into someone your not, and i want to help you" need less to say i am my own person now she just let me kno that she likes me the real me, and now we are best friends! just be yourself and you will get the true friends that you want in life. not the ones who will leave you if you mess up once! best friends! true friends! dosnt that sound good?
well i hope i have put some advice into your head, BE STRONG!!!

*Marianne*

This is long but really worth reading, i didnt got bored of reading this 'cause this was really well written, i can feel so much pain while reading this. I've also felt like this, like.. im so desperate to find even just one person whom i can call a true friend and who i can love, i also prayed to god like that, but the pain just kept on growing more and i kept praying that one day i can find even just one person, luckily i found a few which i can call true friends :)

anyways, i love this piece, good job