The Risk I Took To Love You

I\\\'ve written these words to help you know
The love, pain, and hurt that I never did show.
I knew your cousin, my best friend was she,
I was aware of that fact that you didn\\\'t know me.
After some time, she introduced me to you.
How surprising that we became friends too.
At that time I had no feeling of this sort.
I guess it\\\'s because - for me you were short.
Not only that, but you were younger than I.
It looked really funny when it was me you stood by,
But after a while of laughter and fun,
I had this feeling that I knew was too dumb.
I started to like you - I don\\\'t know why.
You just gave me a feeling that made me soar high.
I knew in my heart that I couldn\\\'t let you know,
Because of the risk, I kept it an easy-going flow.
The days after that, our friendship was great,
But then I thought, \\\"What if I was too late?\\\"
I gave it more time, more consideration,
In order that I would make a wise decision.
I knew you wouldn\\\'t like me; the fact was so real.
But what would I do with the emotions I feel?
I gave it a try, but not so clearly to you,
I just thought that I would give you a clue.
I was afraid if I told you, my newest friend,
Our fun and laughter would come to an end.
Then it came the time to speak my heart,
Even though I knew that our friendship would grow apart.
When I told you that day, you took it so well,
No longer in that decision would I have to dwell.
The weeks after that went by so fast,
But I knew that one day our friendship would no longer last.
Soon I started to feel nothing like before,
I guess you could say I liked you even more.
But soon after a while, it started to come true,
Farther apart I became from you.
At first I didn\\\'t know what was going on,
But as soon as I stepped into reality, you were already gone.
Now you are just a picture, a dream in my mind,
But trust me at times I\\\'m happy when it\\\'s your memories I find.
When I remember those times and recall your voice,
I think of the past because I really have no choice.
I tell you that at many times, you\\\'ve wiped away my tears,
And at many other times, you\\\'ve thrown away my fears.
Please don\\\'t ask why because I can\\\'t exactly say how,
But it doesn\\\'t really matter because you\\\'re gone from me now.
Just remember that at anytime, anywhere,
To me you could look because I\\\'ll always care.
Even though we went our own separate ways,
I\\\'ll never forget our happiest of days.
Tell me your problems, I\\\'ll understand.
Tell me your needs, and I\\\'ll reach out my hand.
But now that\\\'s just a fantasy, as true as it may seem.
Yes, you my old friend are just a dream.
For always I\\\'ve wanted your hands to hold,
Because I wanted your friendship, it was more valuable than gold.
For one year, there were things you had said,
That with your words and love, I was led
To show you kindness and gentle care,
And to treat in a way that I knew was always fair.
I wondered many times about the friendship we had
What wrong did I do, to make it so bad?
I gave everything you wanted, almost anything.
I gave you my heart, my everything.
But I\\\'ve lost you now, you\\\'re gone forever,
Just remember that I\\\'ll forget you never.
Yes, loving you was worth the risk, though it broke my heart in two.
But I\\\'m glad that I had taken it because it brought me closer to you. now all i have 2 tell u is that i will love u till he end of time