THE NEW GIRLFRIEND

So my ex has a new girl,
I saw her when he brought her to the party.
She makes me wanna hurl,
as she was dressed rather tarty.

She certainly isn't very pretty,
and she looks a little like a newt.
At times she resembles a Yetty,
she reminds me of an old boot.

she is also very smelly,
and claims to be a dancer you see.
But her thighs wobble like jelly,
and she dances round a pole, oh please!

I don't like her dyed blonde hair.
And i think the peroxide has went into her brain.
She really does give a bit of a scare,
and she is amazingly extremely vain.

Her nose is hooked like that of a witch,
and her eyes are beady like rats.
I suspect she is a bit of a b I T C H,
and her belly is really quite fat.

Now you may think i am being rather hard,
but trust me i am nothing but honest.
But she has an ass like lard.
I'm prettier than her i promise.

Now i feel i must go,
and discontinue the roaring.
But before i go i must say,
she is also very boring.

*This isn't very good, thought i would stick it on anyway. I wrote it after meeting my ex's girlfriend. She is actually lovely and i am happy for them but it was just that initial jealousy thing. Its funny now*

Kelly
xx