This poem is actually really good. I haven't seen this rhyme scheme before and it takes a bit of getting used to but once i did, It really flowed well. Lovely poem!!!

I was wondering if you could check out my haiku and tell me if its ok...

Thanx-
xxEvilAngelxx

Trust me, I take as much constructive criticism as I can. It really helps me. I'm not mad.

Thanx for the comment!
xxEvilAngelxx

I loved it. It painted a very vivid picture in my mind. With every line, it seemed the depth of the poem got more intense and interesting - and it was a pleasure to read.

"One by one, deathly armies gladly take,
What was never theirs in this ending wake."

^^ Those two lines were amazing. I loved them.

5/5

-Jenna.

Wow. i loved the point of view in here, made me really think about the end of the world, which is scary but reedeeming at the same time for many. wonderful descriptions.

Interesting poem, I liked the way of writing- seemed somehow familiar. O.o Ahwell. Very good poem indeed.

Happy Writing
Hannah-

Amazing.
very interesting and marvelous rhyming

I am definitely in love with the rhyme scheme. that's so creative. it all rhymes but the second and last sentences' last words are the same! that's so cool!!

^_^ I liked this one a lot. It gave me a real meaning of what's happening in our world, and we're not trying to stop it.

I liked the new scheme you've used. Although I didn't like the 2nd and 4th line being the same at first, I slowly got used to it.

The flow was stable, and the structure was well done. No fixes with the rhymes were needed either. They were original, and so not cliche lol. Well done. =) 5/5 xoxo

Samantha

Loved it except in the last stanze, where you used 'cease' twice. Excellent write, though. I really enjoyed reading it.

I realy injoyed the read. great job.