All I can say is WOW. Great work. You are very talented. Keep it up.

Wow what a different poem so good and hidden meaning i sometimes find these types of poems hard to understand but you did this softly and perfectly the flow was fantastic i couldnt give any improvements to this keep it up xxx alex xxx (1)

Wow.. I really like this. It was a very imaginative idea. The only thing that I saw was that in the last line of the last stanza it reads:
A took a nap, a rest anew
The first word should be and. But you did a great job on this. I like the aaba rhyme scheme that you had. You were very descriptive in this and it was easy to picture everything. You did a great job on this! 5/5 Keep it up!

OMG, that was so dark! It was so amazingly written, sent a chill up my spine, i can see straight away you have a talent. well done
xxxxx

Ok, first off that was just, wow! It was so darky feely

Hm. This was pretty good. I always liked the ones that rhyme.. haha, I give it a five alll the way.

Keep writing, I'm looking forward to reading some more of your work.

Amazing write!!!!
i loved this poem!
wow... i mean wow!!!
5/5 thats all i can say!

I love this poem, and the vocab that you put into it. It must have taken a while to edit and all of that good stuff. KEEP up the good work.
;)

That was a great poem. You are a good writer

This is absolutly wonderful!!!!
-Marina

Wonderful! Too bad the flow was off at times or at least it seemed that way to me, anyway I liked it! 5/5

The imagery in this poem was AMAZING! The rhyming scheme was pretty bad hiney, too. The flow was okay; better in some parts than in others. It was still a great poem, let me tell ya. This poem seems sort of like Shakespeare, minus the way his words are.

Overall, the imagery was fantastic and other aspects were good, but not nearly as great. If you find someone that has better critiquing skills, it might help more than this. 4/5

The imagery in this poem was well written, however the rhymes were a bit forced. You had some creativity with what words you rhymed, and the grand scheme of AABA was very good. Your flow was thrown off at a few places. Just a suggestion, if you keep in mind the amount of syllables per line, keep it the same throughout the stanza, and your flow will be great. Not always but most of the time.

I think that this is a great poem. It has a nice rhythm and good word choice. Keep up the good work.

Wow...I loved this.
It has to be one of my favourite dark poems on here.
You have real talent for imagery as well as wording.
Keep up the good work.

This is an awsome poem :D you are a great writer ,,, but you probably have experiance with it .. if i can say that :P

*Was wound and very near entwined*

wound?

*Around her fingers, but so dear*
=clear

*And took a nap, a rest anew*

= bad ending in my opinion.

This poem was better than the others of yours that i read, but i am seeing your poems as a little forceful and wanting to fulfill a desire. Try to make the poems come from the heart... not from the mind.

5/5
~Stephen White

It was a different and imaginery requring poem but you did an excellent job on this,it deserves a 5

The story it told was wonderful! really brought out how much you can write and wat capabilites you can do! you are a very talented poet. keep writing, well done.

5/5 david

I don't know if I can keep reading your poetry, because as I keep reading, I feel so much more emotion drain out of my body. THAT is how much your poems move me. I have no idea how you are able to create such sad, moving, creative stories with your pen, but I just cannot get enough of it. Please... Keep writing!! :)