Just

by Randomness   Oct 22, 2006


Night of the concert
Huge Choir concert
Yet I sit out at the side of my School
In the soft grass
The Night was dark
Yet my head was on my knees
Looking down at my black dress
I think of all the things I should be Happy for
Imagine I'm in a meadow
With butterflies flying all around
A smile upon my face
Yet that image
Quickly erase
What was I thinking
I cant get out of
What is truly happening
I start to cry
Breathing barely
--------------------------------
This Truly happened
and twas the way I felt.
Tears rolling down my cheeks
Eyeliner and Mascara smeared
I sit there for minutes
Then Nikki
My dear friend
Comes and yells at the other girl
Who was to perform
She tries to cheer me
Though Hannah the other Performer
Wanted to stay behind and help
Nikki sent her inside
And tried to help
My sadness of a heart
I couldn't answer
What was wrong
It would of taken a life time
So instead she took my cell
And entered her number in it
Told me if I ever needed to talk
I could just call her
I love her
She's like my sister
Though
I'll never be the same
Since Thursday.

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Latest Comments

  • 18 years ago

    by Lauren Waszkiewicz

    Much better i really likes this. the beginning was very good. -a warnign im not sure if you meant to do this. but you capitialized many odd words. i'd fix that-unless you meant to.

    a few things the second line-is just a repetition of the first basicly. you could simply get rid of it. lol. also. this whole section kinda killed the atmostphere you created in the beginning

    Comes and yells at the other girl
    Who was to perform
    She tries to cheer me
    Though Hannah the other Performer
    Wanted to stay behind and help
    Nikki sent her inside

    ~this isnt a story. every thing doesnt need to be blatently said. try ussing metaphors and other literary devices to help potray these types for things happening.

    try to make it less blunt and more poetic. but good job. =]

    x3 Lauren

  • 18 years ago

    by Brittany C

    Sorry did finish my last comment so here I can defiantly understand this poem. Keep up the good work.5/5

  • 18 years ago

    by Brittany C

    Very good poem. I can defiantly

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