Was I wrong?
To be with him, though he made me complete?
To feel as if he genuinely understood,
All the complexities of my soul?
To let his smiles and laughter,
Bring me to dizzying heights of infatuation?
To feel his heart beat like mine,
To let him hold me, to reach for me?
Every single moment of every single day,
That I couldn't see him, my only constant thought,
Was the fear of forgetting his face.
Scared that there would be a day,
I would just be me,
And no longer us.
So wrong,
Because I became too naive
So naive that in momentary bliss...
I forgot that being happy only lasts so long.
For in my uttermost highest sensations,
Love grew hesitantly, but surely
Because as the cliche goes,
Always and forever, he told me,
He would be there when I should ever fall
And I fell hard,
Falling for everything he was,
All the things I've waited to hear, to feel
You were all I cared for,
You were so right for me,
Even your imperfections I was eager to see perfectly,
I was wrong to believe him,
For all that I thought he wanted, all that I was,
Became shattered once more
I don't know how I became so wrong.
Wrong for him as time grew on.
Now every single moment of every single day,
My constant my only fear is reminiscing,
Scared that a single sound, scent, or song
Would bring back the feelings,
That always rushes back in dizzying bittersweet confusion,
That I must painstakingly recollect, to make myself whole.
Descending downwards into the dynamics of desolation,
Though terror permeates into every pore in my body,
Though only the inevitable oblivion awaits me,
I plummet down to my fatality,
I was wrong, perhaps even now,
But I will never be wrong again.
