If I could

If I could go back in time
if I could change your mind
if I could tell myself we aren't friends
if I could only change my life
if I could tell myself NO more
if I could tell you NO more fighting
if I could only stand up for myself
if I could ever be friends with you again if you weren't a jerk
if I could say I'm sorry
if I could say I love you
if I could only explain my life to you if it wasn't horrible
if it only could be easy to say goodbye