I need you!

by Letty   Oct 25, 2006


Sitting below the stars
Staring at the dark sky
wishing that I were someone else.

Knowing in my heart
that wishes don't come true
But deep inside I'm hoping this one does.

I close my eyes tightly
because of the pain that I feel.
My eyes then begin to water up
But I refuse to let it rain.

With each minute that passes by
my heart decreases with each beat.
Waiting for you, seems like an eternity.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Noo track to walk

    I love this poem !!! u express ur pain ooo..thats very beautiful poem !!!!

  • 18 years ago

    by PygmyPuff

    I love how this is filled with emotion, and the vocabulary is so rich. However it does seem a bit jumpy; a few syncapated words make for good peoms, but it interupts the flow a bit.

    The second stanza, the first line ends in "do"
    I dont know if you were trying to make it rhyme, but it doesnt really work, it should be does.

    Thanks for your awesome critique on those two poems. Theres not enough people you comment like that on here

    [PygmyPuff]

  • 18 years ago

    by Weeping Wolf

    Awww yes...i know that feeling. a woman in waiting. and at times being let down...many times. but there will be days like this n then days when we no longer have to wait. love how you described how you stayed strong n held back your tears! great job! check out some of my more recent ones when you have time, great job letty!

  • 18 years ago

    by Goran Rahim

    This is such a great poem like always, i luv ur words, so great. 5/5

  • 18 years ago

    by Choose xX Alex Xx Life

    I think you should put (this one WILL do) ti help gather sence but other than that i t was fine i think xxx alex xxx

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