A letter to my parents

I've taken the time to write down
a few ideas of mine
to help you understand
why I'm so hard to find

Maybe if the girl at school
hadn't been so rude
maybe if you had been there for me I wouldn't have been in the mood

Maybe if you'd have listened when I said it wasn't my fault
that the door was open to the utility room and the gun vault

Maybe had you heard my plea
to treat me like a human
instead of lashing out at me
like I was some animal

Maybe had my friends not
stabbed me in the back
maybe had the guys
not stared at my rack

Maybe if you even pretended
you loved me
maybe I would know
maybe I would see

But once the door was open
and the gun in my hand
there was no stopping me
from leaving this land

As I pulled the trigger
I screamed loud and clear
"I hope your happy momma
I'm finally out of here!"

When the police finally arrive
and I'm lying in my blood
will you finally forgive me
because I would