Journeys

I'd agree with the above comment about "journey," but i don't see a need for other punctuation or extra adjectives, if this is how you want it.

definitely a very thought provking poem. i'll go read it again : )

Snakes prepare your clouds. You need an adjective in here to describe the clouds.

Interesting, very interesting. Lots of connotations and ideal to take from this poem. You can make this poem flow a lot more easily with the addition of punctuation. A prime example being journeys. is it one journey or many? If it is one and you are describveing its momentum then HAVE to punctuate it to journey's.

I hope you do punctuate this poem properly because it will turn it from an average poem with a good theme to a poem anyone will enjoy.

Bret

Profound and thought provoking write that I have enjoyed reading.
very imaginative piece
Deep.

God Bless!