Its different, I liked it alot up to the last set but otherwise I liked it. 4.0 keep it up
hes more.
hes me.
hes all.

my fav lines

I enjoyed this one too, I like these type of styles. I enjoyed the imagery and flow.

I think that this poem needs more words to it. I liked it though. 5/5

Interesting style. I really enjoyed this. Just as a little advice, it's always best to use the right punctuation, etc. When you're writing "hes" there should be an apostrophe before the 's'. Anyhow, good work.

You are a good writer but your poems would probably be better of you had longer lines and more describing words just a suggestion