Darts Of Pain [Lai]

by Jessica   Oct 29, 2006


Calm beats of a heart
From the skies they part
In rain..
Each drop drifts apart
Forming stunning art
In drains..
Ground hit with small darts
In streams, they depart
Like pain..

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The Lai consists of nine lines and two rhymes, giving the form aabaabaab.

Lines ending with the "a" rhyme are five syllables long. Lines ending with the "b" rhyme are two syllables long.

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by dollwithafrown

    Something I love about your writing is that you manage to use a variety of different styles, and most importantly, make them work. This was wonderful. =]

  • 18 years ago

    by goddess-glamourpuss

    I loved the style of this. The shorter lines really made an impact and aded real punch to the words.

  • This is a unique poem, u dont see much poetry like it on here... its hard to write a poem in this style and u pulled it off... well done

  • 18 years ago

    by SOinLOVEwithYOU

    This is good. but how do you change your name? i wanna change mine. please comment me back so i'll know. thx hunney.

  • 18 years ago

    by Gasttlee

    This is really something.