Life on White Paper *Part One*

Life on White Paper

Placing the pencil to the page
Letting my feelings fly away
Filling up all the white spaces
With all the things I need to say

My life could be a story book
Or so my friends have often told me
So before I write of this life
I think I'll grab a cup of tea

Warm and satisfied with my drink
I cuddle up and begin to recall
Every aspect of my life
The things that make me, me
And keep me standing tall

Just a normal 5 year old girl
Ready and willing to take on the world
Running around in flowered dresses
And my hair was always curled

By daylight happy as can be
Playing hide and seek with friends
But tormented by the night
And the darkness that it lends

Terror running wild through my mind
My parents were in another fight
I convinced them once to stay together
But they couldn't see the light

Security began to take over my dad
Alcohol ran the life of my mother
Separation than divorce at hand
And my dad had custody of me and my brother

I couldn't seem to understand
Why we rarely saw my mum
Couldn't see my dads reasoning for safety
Didn't know my mom was taken over by rum

Months would slowly linger past
Tanner and I switched schools
Didn't think much about anything anymore
Not knowing the world can be cruel

The new school was never any fun
People are so heartless and know one cares
Just an innocent girl made fun of by the world
And as she'd cry, everyone just stared

Life couldn't get any better
Once Christmas break was finally there
Could stay at home for 2 weeks straight
Know one could makes fun of the girl who seemed so queer

Know one can truly understand
How Christmas can end so badly
Know one can truly understand
That I thought I lost everything I had

All the girls and boys would return
Talking about all the new toys they received
But the quiet little girl would return
Saying she'd lost the mother
To whom she'd been conceived

For a few weeks I'd remain upset
But as the months would linger by
The 9 year old girl would grow accustomed
And at night would no longer cry

2 months or so later
An angel came my way
In the spirit of a little girl
Who decided to befriend me and stay?

She and I became extremely close
Spending all of our time together
But by grade 5, she was forced to move away
And our relationship became severed

Things went back to the way they were
The kids were teasing me again
Why had all of this happened to me
Before the age of 10

Three pages of writing
By such a young age and time
Life remains like so till grade 8
As though I'd committed some horrible crime

Among this 4 year time period
My marks had steadily decreased
Anything attempting to enter my mind
Was instantly blocked out...
By a wall that continued to increase

So as you would probably figure
I'd walk home really fast
And on a certain day I was stopped
By a friendship that would last

I wanted to get home
To homework and my television show
But the new girl from Australia
Wanted me to start walking slow

As she stopped me, with a quizzical look
She questioned why I walked so quickly
I replied with an honest answer "Passions"
That was when something clicked

It was on that day, she came over
Together we watched that show
We walked to and from school
And it was then that something began to grow

*Not about love yet in anyway, but once I get there it will be filled with it*

**NOT DONE** this is only part of it...its along project sorta**