A Letter for an Ex Love...

-I put our memory away.
I locked up our box...
I've buried it deep in my soul.
...so we can move on...
I used to look through everything
...at least once a day.
But when -he- came along
...it felt wrong...

You left me...
which told me I was unwanted.
Then when I gave up on you...
-he- took me aside and told me that he really cared.
...I didn't know what to say...
I drifted into thoughts.
I thought all day. I thought all night.
Thought about what just came along.
And I stopped looking at all our pictures.
-and I quit reading all our old e-mails.
I stopped waiting for you to come back.

There will always be a part of me
-that will forever care for you.
There will always be a part of me
-that truly will always love you.
But I couldn't handle you leaving me again...
And I couldn't leave -him-.

...So its time to move on.
Its time to face reality.
Its time to grow up.
And its time for a change in our lives.

The pain won't ever fully go away.
And the memories will too...always be there in my head.
I'll never forget the look you gave me...
--and you know what I say is true.
You know I'll never forget you.

I'm sorry things turned out like this.
But there were just some things I couldn't bare to do.
-and some things that I couldn't let be repeated.
...I don't want to hurt you...
But I need you to see and understand.
It was you that let -us- go.
It was that made the choice of our end.

...It can't be fixed now..
-I'm sorry for that too.-
But your decision has already been made.
Remember that I tried...
-and this was all you.

Don't look at it like its a bad thing.
Maybe it just wasn't meant to be.
-and when you find a new love.
..You'll know how to treat her.
And you'll know how to make it last and make it work.

Don't forget me...
Maybe the way we were might help for later.
Friends is maybe all we're supposed to be.
So a close friend is what you are to me.

What happens next...
the future only knows.
I can't assume anymore.
I'm in a new relationship and it want to have it last.
I want to make it work.

I have no more tears to cry
...for now...
But there will be more to come.
Its not the end of getting hurt.

Forgive me for trying to move on.
But you should do the same.
You never know who will walk in your life...
Just don't let anyone go.
I'm still here.
...but in a different sense.
Things between us aren't the same..
But its OK. We're good.
Good to be friends.

You once told me
...that everything happens for a reason...
But which reason was it
that caused this to happen?

Reread the words I've written.
I found more love. A new love.
Believe that you can too.
....Just know its possible....
...its possible to move on...

(C) By:Deanna Hill