I really like the idea of this one, but i do have a suggestion...some of it seems kinda choppy, like you forgot a word or something... if that was fixed it would definitely be better! but it was still very sweet and overall quite good!

This was a nice poem..but to me, the flow was off and your rhymes were to cliche and in some of them you used the same word..also it kindof confused me when you said he cared deep inside and then all of a sudden he didnt love her anymore...well i think it could be fixed up a bit,,so i give you a 4/5

I really liked it. I thought it had a good rhythm. Just a tip, especially for your quotes. Use capital letters. In a poem, at the beginning of each line and in your quotes when you say I.