I used to love the 5 minutes I'd lay in bed
before falling asleep.
I'd think of you, and the cute things you'd said to me that day.
I'd go to bed laughing and smiling.
happy.
Now I hate them. Its my least favorite time of the day
I stay up as late as possible to avoid those 5 minutes.
Now, though, its not really 5 minutes.
Its so long that it keeps me from sleeping
I still think of you. How you didn't call, and how your not here.
How I'm sure you don't even care.
How you left me for the summer.
I think of the day that I had to give back your sweatshirt and your necklace
to your best friend who lives up the road,
because you couldn't even come pick it up yourself.
I think of how I wish i could've given back the memories too.
That way when another guy asked me out I'd be able to say yes.
I'd know that I was over you and i could have a boyfriend without feeling guilty.
You have your necklace that you let me wear everyday.
You have your sweatshirt that you gave me when I pretended to be cold.
I want you to take the memories.
The memory of what it feels like to be loved, so i don't have to miss it.
The memory of the day that we actually went to a dance together
and you skipped an important hockey game for me so u could go.
I don't know if you know this, but it meant the world to me.
If only for a day I want to know what its like to be loved again for the first time.
To not try to cover up that I miss you.
I miss you.
I loved you.
Come back to me
