But still wishing to not be dead...

I feel sick each day
Fighting back tears
And fears
And pain
That I gain
More each day

Screaming and yelling
Fighting and shouting
Lies and threats
Cries and regrets

I try to ignore it
Each day
I try so hard
In so many ways

As each tear falls
I watch for who might come
Walking down the halls

As I fall backward on my bed
I cry myself to sleep
But still wishing to not be dead
Even though I cry these tears
And living with such fears