My will to live is forever gone

I'm fighting for my life the courage to live

i quit life's games i have nothing left to offer or give...

I'm crashing to the ground long ago i quit holding up my head....

i feel so cold and lonely i my as well be dead...

I'm done trying to hold back these burning angry tears

I'm hiding and trying to push away the damage done

but some guy decided a 5 year old would be a little fun.....

i was alone and neglected

i feel so much shame yet no one cares how I'm affected...

since the rape this hate and fear has my heart infected

one guy after another goes to fast for me they dont understand i feel dirty at their touch...I'm then rejected

my purity was ripped away from my body and its Innocent purity torn apart

now i sit alone with this bottle of pills with a defeated-starving heart

i overdose but they catch me before i die i think to myself just wait ill succeed the next time

i tried to disappear because then so would the filth-dirt and nasty grime

why didn't anyone help me? why wasn't i held as the tears flowed from my eyes....

so much alcohol drugs and confusion i was ignored but so was my cries

why did this happen i want to know if this was my own fault?

my own parents were so trashed and high on meth they didn't care about the assault....

now I'm all alone drowning in my own pain tears....

why did i have to be abandoned then and why do i have to carry this burden alone through these heart breaking years.........

god help me where are you?whatever happened to your compassion and love are you not there? did you not hear my cries see me covered in blood?

did you not see me trapped in overwhelming pain...so much to carry as a child now the pain drowns me as you did to those in your flood!!

you cant be real!!i dont believe no more you didn't stop him you didn't stop the beatings i received!!

i was a mistake from the day i was conceived!!

thanks to no one caring if i lived or died!!

my parents would have sold me for drugs but they never remember they were too fried!!

i hate this life and all the people who wanted me dead!!but guess what i survived!!!

but yet my heart long ago died....