Not Wondering Anymore

As I lay on my bed, I can’t help but think of the two of us. I get such a good feeling when the thought of you lingers in my mind. You were my everything. And yes we had our good times and our bad, but then again what couple doesn’t. But what really comes to mind first, is that one bad time that ruined everything. After all that I gave you, you just messed it all up like if it never meant anything to you. It hurt so bad when I had to let you go. I never thought that I would ever have to do it, but you practically made me. I knew I had to, but it didn’t mean I wanted to. I try with all of my power to keep you out of my mind, but it’s pretty much impossible for me to do that.
That’s why when you asked to be my one and only for the second time, I wanted so much to say “yes”, but it’s not that easy when you know that that one person has hurt you in such a way you can’t forget. When I get the thought of the two of us being together again, a smile comes to my face, but soon fades away with tears. What if you do it again, I ask my self constantly. But I forget about it for once, and say yes.
So we’ve been together for two months now, and things are going back to the way they were. You drinking every day, coming to my house in the middle of the night banging on my window. And those nights I hate. Waking up in the morning with a black eye and a bruised cheek was never fun for me, but at least now I know that giving you a second chance didn’t change anything. And now I won’t be asking my self “Would it have worked if I had just given him another shot” cause obviously it didn’t.