Inhale

Today I had the courage
to sit by you
side by side
knees touching..
But I wish I did not
I wish I had walked away
because when you
looked up at me
with those blue eyes
squinted with their light
starting to fade
I felt sick.
I still can't believe you inhaled
all of that shit!
Do you know what pain
you cause?
You are killing me you know.
I can't stop
thinking of you
blasted..so crazy high
looking up at me with those eyes..
In those seconds I was afraid
that I had forgot to speak
all I could do
was look at Kenny pleadingly..
I finally asked you what was wrong
your head in your lap again..
I heard a muffled \"okay\"..
Is this your way of getting to me?
Of making sure that I pay?
Why you would
I still don\'t know..
No matter how hard it killls..
and I may try to make myself bleed over it eventually..
you are still only killing yourself in the end..
Hurting yourself,
you are killing me
slow pain, strong inhale..smooth..
Killing yourself
hurting me
slow pain strong inhale..smooth..
Killing your memory
hurts me
slow pain strong inhale..smooth
killing me
hurting you slow pain strong inhale smooth..
Inhale deep...