Closed Doors.

I'm constantly being counted on
To hold my head up high
Smile through my tears
And never wonder why

I'm supposed to keep this posture
Like I have been all along
I can never trip nor fail them
And act like nothings wrong

I can never falter a tear
For that just wouldn't be me
I'm the happy loving laughing girl
If only they knew beyond what they see

I break down in my room
Behind the closed locked door
I cut out all my pain
And watch it drip to the floor

I just want to be perfect
I dont want to be some sick freak
But behind that closed door
I can stop pretending and be weak

For that is what I truely am
And if you'd ever care to know
Behind that closed door
All my worrys and fears can flow

In rivers and streams of sympathy
I've created for myself
And If ever I cut too deep
I silently pray for help

I do not wish to bother you
With these problems oh so small
Ill just put on this face
And then sneak into my four walls.

And until the day I die
Which at this rate wont be long
Ill just keep behind this door
And act like nothing is wrong.