You Have My Heart

1st stanza, last line to night should be tonight
2nd stanza, last line the flow is off silightley try removing a word or two
other that that the simple word choice was effective here, the emtion was strong, and the
was suprisingly great. another wel done job 5/5

Nice, sweet. pretty good. i like it. i think it'd be cute to give to him. lol

I have given you everything,- i think this line should be I have given you my everything, -idk im odd,.

and ithink you should have a break after the last line... cause i started reading your message like it was part of the poem.. lol

Also- commas at the end of each line is not correct punctuation. Please try to use correct punctuation. maybe periods, some commas, semi and regular colons?

x3 Lauren

Mmm, i dunno. don't want to be harsh (but i speak my mind", i didn't like it much, it wasn't terrible, but it didnt seem to catch my eye, therefore seemed not to flow well, but it was a good try, and we should all be grateful for that.
well done

Its goodd. but there is something not there. its a good try tho. 4/5.

I think that the phrase cloud nine is a bit over used.and some phrases are a bit repetitive perhaps. But the sentiments are good.