Hey allison,
well umm it sounds just like me but you know what your poems are better then mine and i think that your poem goes with almost every girl that is on this site that writes poems to get out how they feel about others and if only the others would look at them but i dont even think they unless you ask them anyways it was awesome.
danielle coooper

This had a nice flow to it, I really liked it. Keep up the good work n God bless.

Stay Playa,
SC

I like the void for numerous different reasos, so i loved that ending. but i think that you shouldm describe more; as in "how they hold you back",.. etc.. lats part seems just like the narrator talking to themself. "grates" isnt really a right word for a void, if you see what i mean? maybe it's just me but it's a weird word choice. but i do l ike it and the fluidity, cpherency overall..

Awesome! good work I'm goin to check out your other poems

Words such as "and, I, you" are subjective and often ruin the rhythm, or flow of the poem. Of course there are many cases where such words are necessary, but for example:

"And so no one can see me"

And is very unnesessary and hampers the flow.

This is a poem very much in your mind, and your mind alone. I say that because I have no idea what it means. You must ellaborate and tell your reader exactly what you want them to know. The more specific you are the easier your message will be conceived and cherished. Follow a guideline of sorts, such as telling a story, or recalling a memory.

Hmmm it was good, but i know it could be better. But good job... 5/5 ps. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!